lonecity.com

As a child I was fortunate to have grown up in a most unique position.  Its true that some of the things that went into my childhood have made me into what I would call a broken man.  I don’t seem to be able to function quite right in and around others.  Still some of the things I went through as a child have also made me see things from a unique perspective.  Without going into much detail I will say that I was raised home built at the turn of the century (1890’s).  This house was a spectacular marvel compared to the more modern homes my few friends inhabited. 

Built by or for a polygamist mormon family the home had all sorts of hidden passages, and it was quite spacious.  Three floors and 10 bedrooms.  There was a bomb shelter that ran under the backyard, and a secret tunnel from the bomb shelter that ran to an adjoining one at the neighbors house.  The next door house was built at the same time, but of the two homes mine was lived in, while the one next door was declared a historical landmark.  It had been fixed up, preserved, and used mostly to show off.

Also due to my situation I was mostly alone for my childhood.  I always had a roof over my head in this big house, but my parents weren’t around.  I lived with my grandmother.  From about the time I was eight years old she was in a wheelchair so I had almost complete freedom to do whatever I wanted growing up.  There are some stories there that I won’t go into, but suffice it to say I’d probably still be in prison for some of the stupid shit I did as a teenager.

My grandfather was a world war II veteran, but he died sometime before I took up residence in my grandmothers house.  Since the lowest floor of the house was not connected to the top two floors it was mostly used to store all the junk my grandparents had.  A basement full of tube radios, tools, and various life accessories from the 40’s.  There was a whole room full of bottled fruit food storage, and I’m sure some of it probably dated all the way back to when my grandfather was still alive.  There were also giant wooden racks with screens that were built for drying fruit. 

What I am getting to is an observation about something I witnessed often as a child.  In back of the house we had at least half dozen golden delicious apple trees.  As a child I would often climb a tree, sit up there picking and eating apples right from the tree.  The few adults who would come around would pick apples and bring them into the house.  I guess in their lives they had been taught to pick the apples and preserve them so that in times of hardship there would be food.  Something I vaguely understood but I am sure most children and people my age won’t even grasp.  It was more of a way of life than a weekend project.

Any number of times in my life I have seen a basket of fresh apples set on a table while the best ones are taken away and eventually the worst looking ones turn to rot and were thrown out.  With so many producing trees and never selling the apples there were plenty to spare.  I remember an experience recently as I bought golden delicious apples at the grocery store and thinking back to my childhood.  I probably paid more than a dollar per apple for the good looking ones.  Knowing that I am sure the trees in my grandmothers house probably produced five to ten thousand dollars worth of fruit each year.

I’ve wandered off topic again, but what I wanted to talk about in my blog today is how an apple rots.  You see if you set an apple on the counter and leave it long enough the inside will turn brown.  Then the  skin will turn dark yellow.  Eventually it turns mushy and almost black.  Of course it never gets to that stage before thosands of tiny fruit flys appear.  It is this phoenomenon that my observation relates to.  Where exactly do these tiny fruit flys come from?  Why does the fruit start to rot in the center first?  I suspect the answer lies in the fact that the rot is and always has been there inside the core. 

This truth is in all things.  Humans are just like fruit.  We are born, we ripen, then we rot and we get recycled back into the earth.  It may seem like a far off topic, but I’m thinking of life in general and my life in this great country as I write this.  I love the united states and I genuinely believe this is the greatest place in the world.  However I also have seen the rot that exists within our core and I know that even though the apple isn’t showing brown the maggots are there.  Within our politics, our religeons, and amongst our people the corruption is growing.  As much as I love my country I know she is a beautiful animal that is eventually fated to die.

After 9/11 this country changed.  While everything feels the same to the blind masses, some of the mechanisms behind the machine were changed out.  A person used to be able to go get a bank account, find a job, go shopping, and live day to day without the government interfering in our lives.  The fear created by 9/11 has changed that.  At this time to get a bank account you must indentify yourself to the bank so the government can track your money.   To get a job you must have a bank account in order to get paid.  To go shopping even for the essentials you have to have money and so just to live you must always be  under uncle sam’s watchful eyes. 

I don’t really know why exactly, but somewhere along the way I made the decision that I want to establish a second identity.  I want to put together a name, a bank account, a credit card, maybe even a social security or tax id number that belongs to a ficiticious person.  I don’t really have any intent to do wrong with this identity.  I just see so much of the corruption and the decay in society today that I feel like to be safe I need to do this. 

Its probably the same instinct that has crazy nut jobs stockpiling weaponry in their basments. (note to self add buy guns to task list…)  Still I am going to go on with this idea at some point.  I looked around the net for some ideas and I’ve decided it will probably take between two thousand and ten thousand dollars to truly establish a totally unique identity.  At this point I don’t have have even the two thousand to spare so I won’t proceed right away.  I suspect the ten thousand mark is more likely to be a realistic figure.  I do intend to make this blog into a multi post series documenting my progress.  The next post on this topic will likely be in a few months when I have saved enough money to take the first step.

In the mean time, while I am squirreling away money I would like to have your comments and ideas.  I can see how to create an income online with some work.  I have some ideas on how to establish a bank account without an ID.  I feel like to make this really a success though I need to find a way to get a legitmate ID under a bogus name.  Any thoughts on how this might be done?  Also, how do you all suppose I should chose the name of my new identity?  Maybe something with a hidden hacker meaning would be cool.  (to be continued in part 2…)